Friday, September 16, 2011

Marriage - Nice article

MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outsidethe door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

i've read this many times and each times it has always made me in tear :)
such a nice and touching story

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Tuhan itu baik sekali

Jadi ceritanya gini.

Kira2 sebulan yang lalu, aq sama suami sedang berbelanja di hypermart. Aq lg mencari sabun mandi dan suami mencari shampoo.

Selama ini aq make sabun mandi suamiku krn baunya yg seger. Aq ga trlalu suka yg milky or fruity or sweet.

Maren sempet beli sabun mandi d*** yg wangi lemon. Tapi dasar nya dari sabun yg milky jadinya walaupun wangi citrus tetep aja ada bau milky. So i force myself to use it. Sampe setengah i leave it. Kembali memakai sabun suamiku.

Until a month ago aq ke hyper pengen beli sabun mandi yg lain.
Aq liat dari L**, B****, sama C****.
Yg trakhir kluaran baru.
Aq cium baunya tp koq baunya nyenget, milky bgt gitu. Smua sabun nya pasti yg cairannya putih kental. Eneq bgt sama baunya. Trus aq liat eh ada Pal******, aq pake ini waktu skul di oz. Trus udh mau ambil. Tapi liat harga lah dobel harganya yg local :(

Oiya bagi aq hrganya cukup lumayan krn keuangan kita lg squeezy pada saat ini, maybe kalo bagi yg lain.
Ya ampun sebotol 250ml cuman 34 rebu. Kalo aq dlu mah cuek aja itu mah masi murah But for me utk saat ini cukup perlu dipertimbangkan hehehe...

Well cutting short. Aq nanya hubby, i love this smells..aq ga suka yg lain. Perlu beli ga yah.
Hubby say ya terserah kamu sih.
Cuman aq mikir2 akhirnya aq ambil yg pling murah which is Car*x.

Tp dlm hati sih pengen banget cuman ya udah deh ga pa pa.
Aq juga ga ngerengek minta Tuhan:)
Udh terbiasa diajar Tuhan utk 'ya udahlah' jadi ga manja lagi.

Anywayyy pake cuman bbrp kali i stopped balik lg ke sabun hubby.

Trus tadi pas belanja, aq ga keingetan sabun mandi, not even in my shopping list. Tp kayak diingetin beli sabun mandi.

Jadi aq blg sama adikku, aq pengennnnnn bgt beli sabun Palm****e, btw, aq blanja sama adikku mlm ini.

We walked towards that section.
Trus pas di section sabun yg aq mau si ms.P. I cant believe what i saw

Its say there...buy 1 get 1.
I was like hah???
Kalo bagi 2 jadi cuman sebotol rp. 17.000.lalu aq bandingin sama yg murah cuman beda bbrp ribu per botol. Compare to the quality it is much more worthed.. Im so happy thank You God :) thank U Jesus..

I grab 4 pcs hihihi..
Tuhan itu baik yah..asal kita mau bersabar menunggu, dan kita tidak memaksakan keinginan kita. Tuhan pasti akan kasih yg terbaik buat kita.

Iya donk..Tuhan jg mau bikin kita happy terus kok :) Dia senang bikin kita happy :)

Ya asalkan kita punya humble heart, and seek Him first.

God bless


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

No bake raspberry cheesecake or Old fashion chocolate cake

i'm in love with baking :) cooking is yet to come i guess..

so it pop up in mind that i wanna make something Cheesy or Chocolaty

The hardest things living with 2 families in one house is that they don't eat the same food / flavour.

if i make cheesecake only 3 max 4 people eat that.
if i make chocolate cake hmm...that'll be quite a number of people who liked 'em. esp. kids..

hmm..i think i might go for chocolate cake so the kids (with the kids i mean hubby nephew) all 3 of 'em prefer chocolate then cheese :D

Here are the recipe : i adopt from paris pastry blogspot :D

Here's the link :
http://parispastry.blogspot.com/2011/01/old-fashioned-chocolate-cake.html

or might wanna make this :
http://parispastry.blogspot.com/2011/07/no-bake-raspberry-cheesecake.html

we'll see later on :D

Monday, August 15, 2011

Mille Feuille Crêpes cake Recipe "Try out"

 so 2 days ago i decided to make this cake, after work. i'm craving for this for long time but never have the gut to made them. Thanks to masterchef australia and thanks to the blogger that share recipe :)

i can't bear the craving any longer i decided to made and leave it overnight. so yesterday i start to make the crepes, it took me 2 hours to made this, but its all worthed.

ah...as for me because i forget to buy the assemble part cream, i made the pastry cream and the crepes in advance.lol..


the next day when i add the assemble cream to the pastry cream it won't stick, so i whisk it vigorously, yes it does stick but it turns out not as smooth as the recipe's one :)


well despite that minor, it's still yummy tho :D. Might try it again some other time :D


i got about 30 crepes coz i like it thin :)

Here are the recipe.
i also looked at this one here
http://www.recipelink.com/mf/14/19746

source : http://parispastry.blogspot.com/2009/02/mille-feuille-crepes-cake.html

Mille Feuille Crêpes Cake recipe: Batter adapted from "Joy of Cooking", pastry cream adapted from "Desserts" by Pierre Herme.

Ingredients for crêpes batter:
- 6 tablespoons butter
- 3 cups milk
- 6 eggs
- 1 ½ cups all-purpose flour
- 7 tablespoons sugar
- ½ teaspoon salt

Ingredients for vanilla pastry cream:
- 2 cups milk
- 1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract
- 6 egg yolks
- ½ cup sugar
- 1/3 cup cornstarch, sifted
- 3 ½ tablespoons butter

Ingredients for assembling cake:
- 2 cups heavy cream
- 1 tablespoon sugar
- 3 tablespoons Kirsch (I omitted this) --> me too

 - Confectioners' sugar, optional

Instructions for crêpes batter:
- The day before serving the cake, make the crêpes batter and the pastry cream.
- Cook the butter in a small pan until it is brown like hazelnuts.
- In a large pan, heat the milk until steaming. Allow to cool for 10 minutes.
- With a mixer on medium-low speed, beat together the eggs, flour, sugar and salt. Slowly add the hot milk and browned butter. Pour into a contair with a spout, cover and refrigerate overnight. Bring batter to room temperature.

- Place a nonstick or seasoned 9-inch crêpe pan over medium heat and cover the surface with oil. Add 3 tablespoons batter and swirl to cover the surface. Cook until the bottom just begins to brown, about 1 minute. (you need to peek constantly, do this with a rubber spatula) Then carefully lift an edge and flip the crêpe with your fingers. (the crêpes are super hot, so cover your fingertops, or just your thumbs, with a band aid) Cook on the other side for 5 seconds. Flip the crêpe onto a flat surface. Repeat until you have 20 perfect crêpes. (I got about 17 crêpes)

Instructions for vanilla pastry cream:
- Bring the milk to a boil. Turn off the heat and stir in the vanilla, then set aside for 10 minutes.
- Fill a large bowl with ice and set aside a small bowl that can hold the finished pastry cream and be placed in this ice bath.

- In a medium heavy-bottomed pan, whisk together the egg yolks, sugar and cornstarch. Gradually whisk in the hot milk. Then place the pan over high heat and bring to boil, whisking vigorously for 1 to 2 minutes.
- Press the pastry cream through a fine-meshed sieve into the small bowl. Set the bowl in the ice bath and stir until the temperature reaches 140 degrees on a thermometer. Stir in the butter. Cover and refrigerate overnight.

Instructions for assembling cake:
- Whip the heavy cream with the sugar and Kirsch. Fold a quarter of the whipped cream into the pastry cream, then the rest.
- Lay 1 crêpe on a cake plate. Using an a rubber or icing spatula, cover with a layer of pastry cream. Repeat until you've used all of the crêpes. Lay the best-looking crêpe on top.
- Chill for 2 hours. Dust with sifted confectionars' sugar. When ready to serve, slice it like a cake.



Here's mine :D 
Assemble cream
the assemble cream (mix with pastry cream)

the stack of crepes

very 1st layer

the after 3 hours refrigerated

tadaaa....yummmm..the look itself is so so..but taste hmm..



Monday, August 1, 2011

IPAD 2 --> ios 5

Yihaaaaa...luv luv luv luving it...

IPAD 2 with ios 5..YAYYY...Awesomee...
still beta version tho and altho we have to pay quite dear for those but its all worthed. :D

you can do all this finger moves :D Which is new thing for us hahaha..

Here's the sneak peek :D
http://www.apple.com/ios/ios5/features.html
http://gadgetfeel.com/6-finger-moves-for-the-ipad-2-that-you-should-know/

Really need "extra" for this thing.
- extra money
- extra work
- extra queuing

First : we need to queue when buying. we get it @ibox central park with @VJauw and hubby
second : we have to pay cash hahahahaha..coz the credit card has problem rrrr...
third : we need to buy the uber expensive casing!
forth : now with the upgrade to ios 5 need to pay xtra money :D

what a TOY :D

He is Good. He is soo Good.. He is Jesus

since friday 2 weeks ago..back from COOL / FA (Family Altar) where a group of people praise together and then share about the goodness of our God.

so we sang this song.
Apapun yang terjadi dalam hidupku ini
tak pernah ku ragukan kasihMu Tuhan
lewat gunung yang tinggi
lewat lembah yang curam
Kau berfirman dan sembuhkanku
Kau bersabda dan slamatkanku
tak ada yang mustahil bagiMu
Yesus ku percaya padaMu

then back home..I already forget the tones, i've asked family at home but none get it. they sang this instead
apapun yang terjadi di dalam hidupku
selalu ku berkata Tuhan Yesus baik.

Nah..not that..so i asked Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit teach me please that song, the one we sing at FA. :(
but still i can't remember.

so the next friday which is, last friday..in my desperate act. i keep on asking Holy spirit.
mum in law suddenly sang that song. and i was like..
"ahhhhhh that song that song that song" i was looking for the tonessss..ahhh thanku Holy Spirit.
then last sunday at church, the last songs. they sang this song..hahahahaha...
and i'm in tears:D

and the preaching has answered my questions.

Well God..i know for sure there are no "by chance or accidentally" U have arrange everything :)

Thank You Jesus. love You..

Friday, July 22, 2011

KOM 100 - Father Son Holy Spirit

Yesterday in KOM 100.

One of the question is this...

God is One but often divide into 3 Person, which is
Father
Son
Holy Spirit

Why?
They are One but they act into you can say 3 functions and represents  ;
Father : The creator
Son    : The Doer
Holy Spirit : The Helper

Father : creates us, Father that wants us to be saved
Son  : who do Father will, sacrifice himself, to redeem us from our sin, from death and gives us an eternal life.
who shows us the way to Father in heaven. He is Jesus Christ - Our saviour 
Holy Spirit : who helps us going thru everything, helps us to be like Him - Jesus, helps us to fight our sin, remind us and many things you can think of.

then why 3?
coz we human consists of : Spirit (Father), Soul (Holy Spirit), Flesh (Jesus Christ)
coz Jesus came to this world in Flesh, be like us.

Why? Why? such a fuss to saved us humans? who are we that He the creator wants to saved us from this sinner world.
Hmm...yeah me often asked that, who are we Lord that You came into this world as Jesus Christ, to saved us from sin and gives us eternal life. i can't understand.

In Genesis it says
Genesis 1 : 26
"And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth"

so..each all of us human represent God's images, and if we trust in Son (Jesus Christ) we will be saved coz Jesus says in Joh 14:6
"Jesus saith unto him, i am the way, the truth, and the life: no man commeth unto the Father, but by me."

and God the Father himself said that too in;
Matthew 17 :5 : "While he yet spake, behold, a bright cloud overshadowed them: and behold a voice out of the cloud, which said, THIS IS MY BELOVED SON, in whom i am well pleased; hear ye him."

Mark 9:7 : "And there was a cloud that overshadowed them: and a voice came out of the cloud, saying, THIS IS MY BELOVED SON: HEAR HIM."

2 Peter 1 : 17 :"For He received from God the Father honour and glory, when there came such a voice to Him from the excellent glory, THIS IS MY BELOVED SON, in whom I AM WELL PLEASED."

John 1:34 : "And I saw, and bare record that THIS IS THE SON OF GOD."

so it is not only Jesus himself who says that HE IS THE SON OF GOD, but FATHER SAID THAT TOO.

* well u can correct me if i'm wrong. me just sharing :)
* actually i don't know why i'm writing about this. it's just when i scroll the facebook page i suddenly become so bored of the useless things so i closed down the page and suddenly popped in my mind. why not write this.

and Holy Spirit guide me to search for the verses. (Lucky us in electronic bible u can search one word and it appear :) )
but still without Holy Spirit guiding me, i don't even know what to search :D

like this is the first time for me, obey :p hihihi..gosh..what am i earlier..rebel kid :(

Father in heaven, i was wrong, i apologized, and thank you coz i know You will forgive me :)
in Matthew 6 : 14 :"For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you"

so in order to ask for Father forgiveness, we must first forgive our enemy, people that we hate, people that we fight with :D

It's hard, it's not easy for real..but remember we have the Helper who is Holy Spirit, He will helped us throught it..

i often say in my prayer " God i can't forgive this person with my own strength, but i want to forgive this person, please Holy Spirit make me"

then i'll feel in my heart (sometimes up to days hehehe) a pityness and then i'll forgive 'em right away sometimes took weeks or months hahaha..

but appear in my mind. if i don't forgive them then Father in heaven won't forgive me and that is my loss..my biggest LOSS. so i just surrender to Holy Spirit and He make everything easyyyy..just flow..

Well i think i'm done for now :) back to my work

love love love u Father Jesus Holy Spirit.
Thank u thank u thank u alotttt for choosing me :D

GOD BLESS YA ALL :D